Last week I decided to do a little pre-school nesting and ended up doing something incredibly stupid. I threw my back out.
Just typing that sentence feels pathetic for several reasons. First, I don’t think there’s another sentence in the world that makes one sound older than, “I threw my back out.” Y’all know I don’t bemoan my age, but I suddenly felt like hearing aids and dentures were Amazon Priming their way into my personal space. Go away, Fixodent! You’re not welcome here!
Second, the way in which I hurt my back only reiterates my first point. I was moving an old desktop computer. Considering recent trends in technology, with an emphasis on portability and lightweight construction, just exactly how old would a computer have to be for it to be so heavy that it hurts one’s back? I’ll plead the fifth on that one.
But finally, it all feels very pathetic because I know how I reacted in the moment. After Jason helped me to the couch, I burst into tears. That alone isn’t the issue. It HURT! I’ve never felt pain quite like that before, and it was a very scary pain, which made it hurt even worse.
But the pain only accounted for about a third of my tears. The rest of my tears flowed from a fountain called “But I don’t have time to be still!” I am, after all, a school teacher in August. Has God seen my to-do list? Now suddenly I have to go to my bed and lie flat and still for hours? Excuse me, I don’t understand the words that are coming out of your mouth.
The familiar command from Psalms rushed to my mind. Be still, and know that I am God (Psalm 46:10). Easier said than done.
Why is being still so difficult?
From the moment we’re born, we want to wiggle. Our parents have to swaddle us with blankets that function as strait jackets just to counteract our innate desire to move, so it’s not surprising that those natural tendencies follow us into our relationships with God. Being still is hard when we’re used to constant squirming.
But He still calls for stillness. Not so we can become more efficient. Not so we can instruct others to carry out our demands. Not so we can intellectually analyze everything or understand all of His plans.
He calls for stillness simply so we can know that He is God.
This type of knowledge is different than knowing about someone or knowing of someone. It’s a personal, intimate knowledge born out of time and experience. It’s knowledge that requires relationship and history.
Do you have that depth of knowledge with God? How well do you really know Him? (Hint: the answer is always, not nearly enough, for there is always more to learn!)
Perhaps you could benefit from being still as well.
(But do yourself a favor and be still before you get the back injury!)
Here’s my challenge for you:
Be still – truly still – with nothing in your hands and no visual or auditory stimulation at all, for TEN minutes today. Think only of the Lord.
Thanks for the encouragement to do this! It was perfect timing – one of those days when I kept saying “I’ll be still later…” But when I saw your post, it reminded me to stop prioritizing other things, and stop being too busy for the undistracted, intimate time with God that I really need so desperately! Today He has drawn my attention toward the beauty of His holiness. And when I slowed down to notice, I realized that earlier in the day He had already drawn me to worship Him through two different songs – both about His holiness! He is worthy of our praise. He is infinitely holy in a way we cannot fully comprehend. And He is desirous of intimate relationship with us and to show us more of Himself, if we will only take the time to be still in His presence!
Wow, you said it perfectly! I love it when the perfect song draws you in to worship! I have a few faves that work every time!
We live in parallel universes, Emily. Being still is what God has been teaching me the most this year, and I recently injured my back. LOL. Thank you for the timely reminder.
Indeed we do! That probably means we should be still together soon! 🙂 Hope you’re on your way to recovery!