When you first hear God speak

I remember it like it was yesterday.

I was sitting in the middle of my white, wrought iron daybed with the mauve comforter thrown haphazardly over the sheets. And I was crying my eyes out.

speak(1)

I’ve heard Oprah call it “the ugly cry,” and that’s what it was. Eyes swollen. Nose red as Rudolph’s. My face painted with an unbecoming mixture of tears, mascara and snot. And the hiccups, of course. Oh the hiccups.

I don’t remember why I was crying, but I do remember that I was in junior high at the time, so that probably means I was crying over some boy who didn’t look at me the right way. I’m pretty sure puberty hormones were in full swing.

But for some reason, through the blurry tears, runny nose and gasping breaths, I reached for my Bible.

In my spiritual (im)maturity, I flipped to the middle of the book, let the pages fall where they may, and dared God to speak to me.

Can I admit that I just about had a heart attack when I began reading?

“My groaning has worn me out. All night long my tears flood my bed. My bed is wet because of my crying… The Lord has heard my sobbing” (Psalm 6:6, 8 NIRV).

I remember looking around my room, half expecting to SEE the Lord watching me! After all, I WAS worn out because of my groaning. I HAD been crying all night. My bed WAS wet because of my tears! Of all the verses in all the Bible, I stumbled upon the one verse that met me right where I was! How else did God orchestrate that if He wasn’t watching me?!

Perhaps there were angels that existed in another unseen dimension in my bedroom who flipped the pages of my Bible for me. Perhaps the Lord sent a gust of air from the air conditioner at just the right time to blow the pages open. Whatever happened, however it happened, He had my attention and I was suddenly sure of two things:

1. The Lord hears me.
2. The Lord cares about me.

For a junior-higher with a severe case of teenage angst, this was huge. I thought no heard my crying, much less cared about my tears. But the Lord showed me otherwise.

I never forgot that Bible verse. It was the first time that God’s Word leaped from the page and stamped itself onto my heart. It was the first time that I saw how God’s Word is “living” and “active” and… personal.

So many Bible verses are meaningful to me. I’ve written about T-shirt verses and blue jean verses before. But to me Psalm 6:6 is like baby shoes that I want to get bronzed and preserved forever. Because to me, it represents some of my very first spiritual steps.

What is the first Bible verse that spoke to you? If you could have one Bible verse bronzed like baby shoes, which verse would it be?

5 Comments

  1. Debbie

    WOW & WHOA!!! I just had an hour long talk with a friend about P R A Y E R !!!!!!! I am a living, breathing, testament to prayers being answered for myself & many others. I guard my spirit & mind with prayer when troubles arise BUT & more so just even through the day when satan would like to jump into my thoughts. We cannot pray enough & when we don’t know what to pray, like Laurie said last night, get a known bible website to help you find the “””right”””” prayers to pray & if you don’t have that then, AND YES EVEN THEN, He hears our groanings when no words will come. L O V E unconditional!
    And….I’ve had way too many of those hiccuping, heart wrenching episodes in my life. They are hard, really hard, on the heart. But as we grow closer to Him & learn to draw strength from Him we can experience less of that happening to us. But then what I’ve found is that nowadays, “I weep with JOY”. (*-*) at the most simple & sometimes just plain funny things. He’s given us tears for a reason & I try to use mine wisely as it says, Ephesians 6:18 | NASB
    18 With all prayer and petition pray at all times in the Spirit, and with this in view, be on the alert with all perseverance and petition for all the saints,
    My 1st bible verse that I memorized was Isaiah 60:1 “Arise, shine; for your light has come, And the glory of the Lord has risen upon you.
    Today my favorite, (I should say, “one of my favorites), is Psalm 27:1 The Lord is my light and my salvation; Whom shall I fear? The Lord is the defense of my life; Whom shall I dread?
    Have a blessed & beautiful rest of the week…….month….year!!!! Luv ya.

  2. Debbie

    Baby shoes! That is the sweetest thing I ever heard. I just might put my verse in a baby shoe if Stephanie doesn’t beat me to it with her Scripture art, I first heard God speak to me when in a dark place too, and the Pastor gave me Ps 91 a difficult time in our marriage. I went home and read it and it changed my life, because I saw how God would care for me and I had a place to hide and promises to hold onto. But the next baby shoes came when we were told our 31 week old premie wasn’t coming home, and we needed to say good by to her (she did come home with us many weeks later). My beloved Grampa’s death had left me reeling as a child, so this brought back those old fears. I walked down the hospital halls talking to God telling Him I would still follow Him even if He took our baby but that I couldn’t do this alone. I needed HELP! After holding my little girls fingers and telling her she would be with Jesus and it would be ok, I went back to my room and there on the nighttray was a verse. “I will look to the hills from whence cometh my HELP! He will not let your foot be moved, … ps 121. A peace I had never experienced flooded my heart, as I knew He would be with me whatever. The next morning, my husband brought me a book (he knows I love books), and I told him about my talk with God. He started crying, and opened the book to a page in the middle, it was a book of poems, and ps 121 was in it. We both cried. We knew God was with us, and would help us, and loved and cared for us. And He was showing Himself to us that very day in an unusual way. I am going to put that in bronze baby shoes! Thanks Emily. Our Abba Father is an incredible Daddy, and He sure does love His kids.

    • Emily Ryan

      Wow, that brought tears to my eyes! What an amazing memory! So thankful God gives us those moments!

  3. Monique

    I loved this post. We often see God when we are at our worst, however He’s there at our best. I don’t have a bible verse per se, but I’ve felt his voice within me during times of extreme fear, and felt his comfort, so I totally resonate with that feeling you had when you saw that passage in the bible. Those kinds of things happen to us every day, it just takes belief to see them. 🙂

    • Emily Ryan

      I agree! The more we look for God, the more we discover He was there all the time!

5 Comments

  1. Debbie

    WOW & WHOA!!! I just had an hour long talk with a friend about P R A Y E R !!!!!!! I am a living, breathing, testament to prayers being answered for myself & many others. I guard my spirit & mind with prayer when troubles arise BUT & more so just even through the day when satan would like to jump into my thoughts. We cannot pray enough & when we don’t know what to pray, like Laurie said last night, get a known bible website to help you find the “””right”””” prayers to pray & if you don’t have that then, AND YES EVEN THEN, He hears our groanings when no words will come. L O V E unconditional!
    And….I’ve had way too many of those hiccuping, heart wrenching episodes in my life. They are hard, really hard, on the heart. But as we grow closer to Him & learn to draw strength from Him we can experience less of that happening to us. But then what I’ve found is that nowadays, “I weep with JOY”. (*-*) at the most simple & sometimes just plain funny things. He’s given us tears for a reason & I try to use mine wisely as it says, Ephesians 6:18 | NASB
    18 With all prayer and petition pray at all times in the Spirit, and with this in view, be on the alert with all perseverance and petition for all the saints,
    My 1st bible verse that I memorized was Isaiah 60:1 “Arise, shine; for your light has come, And the glory of the Lord has risen upon you.
    Today my favorite, (I should say, “one of my favorites), is Psalm 27:1 The Lord is my light and my salvation; Whom shall I fear? The Lord is the defense of my life; Whom shall I dread?
    Have a blessed & beautiful rest of the week…….month….year!!!! Luv ya.

  2. Debbie

    Baby shoes! That is the sweetest thing I ever heard. I just might put my verse in a baby shoe if Stephanie doesn’t beat me to it with her Scripture art, I first heard God speak to me when in a dark place too, and the Pastor gave me Ps 91 a difficult time in our marriage. I went home and read it and it changed my life, because I saw how God would care for me and I had a place to hide and promises to hold onto. But the next baby shoes came when we were told our 31 week old premie wasn’t coming home, and we needed to say good by to her (she did come home with us many weeks later). My beloved Grampa’s death had left me reeling as a child, so this brought back those old fears. I walked down the hospital halls talking to God telling Him I would still follow Him even if He took our baby but that I couldn’t do this alone. I needed HELP! After holding my little girls fingers and telling her she would be with Jesus and it would be ok, I went back to my room and there on the nighttray was a verse. “I will look to the hills from whence cometh my HELP! He will not let your foot be moved, … ps 121. A peace I had never experienced flooded my heart, as I knew He would be with me whatever. The next morning, my husband brought me a book (he knows I love books), and I told him about my talk with God. He started crying, and opened the book to a page in the middle, it was a book of poems, and ps 121 was in it. We both cried. We knew God was with us, and would help us, and loved and cared for us. And He was showing Himself to us that very day in an unusual way. I am going to put that in bronze baby shoes! Thanks Emily. Our Abba Father is an incredible Daddy, and He sure does love His kids.

    • Emily Ryan

      Wow, that brought tears to my eyes! What an amazing memory! So thankful God gives us those moments!

  3. Monique

    I loved this post. We often see God when we are at our worst, however He’s there at our best. I don’t have a bible verse per se, but I’ve felt his voice within me during times of extreme fear, and felt his comfort, so I totally resonate with that feeling you had when you saw that passage in the bible. Those kinds of things happen to us every day, it just takes belief to see them. 🙂

    • Emily Ryan

      I agree! The more we look for God, the more we discover He was there all the time!